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Post by specialfrog on Oct 29, 2008 10:17:34 GMT -5
it is fantastic that Sam got custody- and that Mart is walking them home for dinner. How family-like
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Post by PlainJaneIAm on Oct 29, 2008 15:22:30 GMT -5
Another cute chapter. I think I've said 'cute' 100 times reviewing this fic, but that's just the best word I have for it I guess. It's nice and fluffy and sweet. Great update!
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Post by SamSpade on Oct 30, 2008 10:41:28 GMT -5
Chapter 18:
Martin finished cleaning up dinner as promised, since Olivia and Samantha prepared spaghetti for the three of them. Dinner had been good. Martin was quite surprised Samantha had learned to cook. Having a child, Olivia, had really changed her.
“It’s time to get you changed for bed,” she dropped a kiss to Olivia’s head. “Can you go get your pajamas?”
Olivia nodded, running off to the bedroom.
“Thanks for inviting me over for dinner,” Martin smiled weakly, shifting on his feet uncomfortably. He wasn’t ready to leave but it was getting late.
“You’re not saying goodbye, are you?” She gave him a look.
“I guess not?” He was confused.
“Let me put Olivia to bed. Then we can sit down, watch tv, talk, whatever.” She nodded. “I won’t be long,” she headed to her daughter’s bedroom, helping her change into her pajamas and then brush her teeth. She read her a short bedtime story before tucking her in and closing the door.
“She’s asleep?” Martin asked watching Samantha come out of Olivia’s room.
“She’s on her way to dreamland,” Samantha smiled. “She wasn’t quite asleep but her eyes were heavy.”
“That’s good.”
“Like you wouldn’t believe,” she laughed. “Olivia has become such a sound sleeper the last few weeks.”
“That’s amazing,” Martin smiled watching Samantha sit down on the sofa and he took a seat beside her. “She’s really taken well to you. I mean of course she has, she’s your daughter but, I think it’s great.”
“Thanks,” Samantha smiled. “How have you been doing? We haven’t really talked much.”
“I suppose we haven’t,” Martin nodded. “I’ve been okay. Busy working a lot, visiting the family.”
“How is your family?” Samantha asked, shifting on the sofa, facing Martin.
“They’re good. They ask me all the time when I’m bringing you back over with Olivia.”
“What do you tell them?” Samantha was curious, her eyes inquisitive as she stared at Martin.
He sighed, licking his suddenly dry lips wondering if he should be honest. They’d always been honest with each other and could tell if the other wasn’t being completely truthful. There was no sense in hiding it. “It’s weird for me. You have something with Olivia that,” Martin sighed, glancing down at his hands in his lap. “Honestly I feel a little jealous about. You told me years ago you never wanted kids and now, you have the most amazing daughter. I’ve always wanted children, just seems so unfair.”
Samantha nodded, patting his arm, “you’ll have kids and a family someday. You’re a great catch Martin, don’t let anyone tell you different.”
Martin nodded, letting out a sigh. “Yeah.”
“Did I say something wrong?” Samantha frowned.
“No,” Martin shook his head. “I just, I thought the feelings had gone. Seeing you with Olivia, seeing how much you’ve changed. I miss being with you. I miss what we had.”
Samantha nodded weakly, “I used to miss it to Martin.”
“So you don’t anymore,” he breathed, shaking his head realizing confessing had been a mistake. He moved as if he was going to stand up, only to be stopped by her hand on his chest, gently guiding him back down to sit on the sofa with her.
“I’m not saying that, believe me, Martin, I’m not. I’ve just thought that doors been closed for quite some time now. Right now, my focus is on Olivia, my daughter. It has to be. I don’t want this to push you away, to make you not come around, not spend time with us. I like seeing you, having you over, enjoying a movie with you. I just can’t start dating and delving into a relationship right now.”
“I understand,” he whispered, trying not to feel hurt or disappointed but it was difficult.
“Do you?” She asked reaching out, taking hold of his hand. “Honestly Martin, if we had been dating and Olivia was thrown into the mix, I’d have probably wanted a break.” She stared at him, “not because I love you any less but because I need my attention to be on my daughter. She needs 100% from me and I can’t risk not giving her that. Olivia’s been through a lot.”
“I know,” Martin nodded, unsure what she meant by her loving him any less but thinking it was best left unasked and unanswered. “Should I head out?” He guessed, feeling a bit uneasy, sitting with her on the sofa, her hand still on his.
“You don’t have to but if you’d rather go home because it’s late,” she offered, “I understand.”
Martin stared at her, knowing there wasn’t an invitation to stay the night. “I don’t want to keep you up.”
“Come on,” she nudged him, “you know I don’t go to bed at eight.” She wanted him to loosen up like he’d been recently around Olivia and her.
“I know, I just, maybe some space would be good?” He gently removed her hand from his, resting it in her lap. “Just friends should act like just friends.”
“I don’t see us doing anything inappropriate,” Samantha frowned, “I’m not inviting you into my bed, seducing you, or even getting you drunk. I just thought it’d be nice to hang out a bit longer.”
“Sam, I want more,” he stared at her, sighing before standing up. “I can’t be around here right now, not with the way things are changing and everytime I look at you, my heart beats faster.”
“Martin,” she sighed watching him head towards the door putting his shoes and coat back on. She followed after him, “wait. Please.” Her voice waivered, unsure what she wanted to say but the last thing she wanted was more awkwardness they’d had enough of that for a lifetime.
“I just need some time, some space to let these feelings die out again.” He glanced back at her as he buttoned his winter coat. “I promise I won’t let this change things at work.” He hoped she could say the same. He didn’t want to face the past all over again.
“Okay,” she nodded slowly, frowning as she walked closer, hesitant, unsure what to do, how to fix things. She watched as he opened the door and she stepped closer once again, “did you still want to come by and celebrate on Saturday?”
“Celebrate,” he repeated thinking it over, “Olivia’s adoption,” he remembered knowing they’d spoken about getting together the weekend. “I don’t know, Sam,” Martin let out a heavy sigh. “She’s your daughter, you should celebrate with her.”
“I will but I thought you’d want to be there with us. It’s fine if you don’t,” she didn’t feel as though it were fine but she was giving him an out since he seemed he so desperately was needing it.
“Sam,” he sighed, already sensing her tone, knowing what this was doing to her as well. “I just don’t want to get Olivia mixed up in this,” he gestured between them. “It’s not fair to her.”
“I suppose not,” she sighed defeated, crossing her arms defensively. “I’ll see you at work, Martin.”
“Yeah,” he glanced Samantha over, seeing her defensive position and knowing he struck a chord in her. He hoped she wasn’t angry with him and if she was, she’d get over it sooner than the breakup. He wasn’t trying to hurt her, he just wasn’t sure hanging out with them was such a good idea anymore. He headed out into the hallway and heard the door close behind him. Wincing he hoped tomorrow wouldn’t be like the day after their breakup. The last thing he wanted was the cold shoulder from her all over again!
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Post by Bright Eyes on Oct 30, 2008 11:18:36 GMT -5
Oh no!! What a horrible turn of events! Olivia is going to be so upset - she loves Marty.
The thing is, I understand where each of them is coming from.
Martin confessed how he felt, and though Sam didn't turn him down outright, she has to make Olivia her first priority. But then again, if Olivia had never come into Sam's life, would Martin have wanted to try again?
Now she knows how Martin feels, she can't have expected things to continue on just the same. It would be very awkward. I understand Martin needs to put some distance between them - he's only protecting himself from more heartbreak. Maybe some time apart will give them some answers and then they can sit down and talk.
Wonderful update Samspade, but I'm really glad you told us there's going to be a sequel!!
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Post by Rat on Oct 30, 2008 13:29:06 GMT -5
great update. i knew things werent going to stay all family like with them. they both need to have some time apart and think about what they want. we know sam wont date anyone, but what about martin. should we be worried that the time apart will be long and martin will find someone else. i hope not.
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Post by PlainJaneIAm on Oct 30, 2008 15:11:16 GMT -5
Well... things went from really great to really not great really quickly I hope they can figure out a way to sort out all the feelings between them. I understand Sam's hesitancy to began anything since she just got her daughter, but she should know by now that Martin would be more help than a burden. Great update
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Post by cludwig on Oct 30, 2008 17:58:19 GMT -5
This is a tough one... I do see both of their positions and reasons for needing space/wanting to spend time together. While I think it is wonderful Sam wants to give her little girl everything she can, especially her full attention, I do think a mother who has a well rounded and full life is a good thing for Olivia to see. But maybe Sam still needs a little bit of time to adjust and figure that out.
I really do hope they will work it out and regardless of the current tension I am happy Martin was honest, even if it doesn't feel like that for him right at this moment.
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Post by specialfrog on Oct 30, 2008 20:49:54 GMT -5
ouch...what will tomorrow bring?
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Post by freitazal on Oct 31, 2008 17:38:36 GMT -5
please let this situation be over soon , realy soon ,
i can´t wait for more ,
nanda
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Post by maggie69 on Nov 2, 2008 17:52:08 GMT -5
I feel for Martin. It has to be difficult to see Sam with this child, which is something she's never wanted and he's always wanted. I hope things get better between them.
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Post by SamSpade on Nov 2, 2008 21:43:28 GMT -5
Chapter 19:
Samantha locked up the house once Martin left, feeling her stomach in knots wondering if somehow she’d made a mistake. It sounded as though Martin wanted to get back together with her, try again. She couldn’t believe that. He’d been so adamant in the past about not giving her another chance, that it was too late and his feelings were gone.
She couldn’t help but feel confused and slightly agitated. What right did he have to drop this on her, now? She wasn’t ready for a relationship and a child. It was hard enough dealing with one or the other. Certainly she wasn’t giving up Olivia. She was her daughter now, legally too. The last thing she wanted was to push Martin away but he had to understand that Olivia came first.
Truth be told, she felt terrible though. Even if Olivia did come first, the look on Martin’s face as he was leaving, it broke her heart. She’d been terrible to him at times during their relationship but he’d been there for her, especially the last three months with Olivia, helping out, offering support, just being a friend at times.
Changing for bed, she glanced at the phone, finally dialing Martin’s cell phone but getting his voicemail. She didn’t bother to leave a message. What would she say? We need to talk? That was overstating the obvious. It wasn’t as though talking would fix things either, if anything it was getting them deeper into such a tangled mess.
Shutting her cell phone, she shoved it onto the nightstand, pushing it away from herself.
“Sam?” The bedroom door creaked open and Olivia stood by the door, clutching the teddy bear Martin had given her the first night they’d met.
“Hey sweetie,” Samantha moved off the bed, walking over towards Olivia. “What’s wrong?”
“Bad dream.” Olivia’s bottom lip trembled and Samantha leaned down, lifting Olivia into her arms and taking her to the bed, helping her beneath the covers. Samantha sat down with her on the bed, running her fingers through Olivia’s hair.
“Do you want to tell me about it?” Samantha asked, cuddling up to her daughter in Samantha’s bedroom. She didn’t mind letting Olivia fall asleep in here, so long as it wasn’t a regular habit to be made.
“Marty died.” Tears started making their way down Olivia’s cheeks.
“Oh sweetheart,” Samantha kissed Olivia’s tears away, “Marty’s fine. I promise. He’s just gone home to bed. Tomorrow you can visit him at work with me, okay?”
Olivia nodded closing her eyes with a heavy sigh. Samantha fixed the blankets around her daughter before climbing in bed and shutting off the light. She wrapped an arm around Olivia, letting her share the bed for the night.
Waking up early the next morning, the alarm clocked jarred them both away. Though Samantha was expecting it far more than Olivia had been. The minute Olivia heard the loud radio, she began crying. The last thing she wanted was to wake up, especially having been startled.
Rubbing at her own eyes, Samantha sat up in bed reaching for the alarm, shutting it off. “Olivia,” Samantha gently ran her hand through her daughter’s hair. “It’s time to get up.”
“No,” Olivia shook her head, closing her eyes reaching for the covers trying to pull them over her head.
“Come on,” Samantha smiled, stopping her tiny hands and planting soft kisses on her cheek, drying her tears. “You’ll get to see Marty, don’t you want that?”
Olivia’s tears immediately stopped. She sniffled a few times and nodded, loosening her grip on the sheets. “Now?”
“After we get changed and have breakfast. We’ll visit him at the office.” Samantha nodded. “We can’t visit him right now though because he’s getting ready for work at his house, just like we need to get ready.” Samantha smiled, “how about we get you some cereal?”
Olivia nodded, sitting up in bed and waiting for Samantha to get down first. Together they headed into the kitchen, Olivia climbing onto the chair and sitting at the table while Samantha grabbed a bowl along with the milk and cereal, pouring Olivia some to eat.
“You eat up. I’m going to have a quick shower and as soon as I’m done we’ll get you dressed and we’ll be on our way.”
It didn’t take Samantha long to finish her shower and get herself ready for work. Coming back into the kitchen, she frowned not seeing Olivia insight. “Olivia?” Samantha called out, glancing around. She couldn’t help but feel nervous. Her line of work made it her that way. “Olivia?” Her voice came out a little more frantic, heading towards her daughter’s room and breathing a sigh of relief seeing Olivia putting on clothes. Though they were inside out and backwards, Samantha didn’t care. At least she was okay!
“Change,” Olivia tried pulling her arms through the sleeves, getting stuck and making a face quite uncomfortable. “Help!” Olivia held both arms above her head as best she could, wanting Samantha to fix the mess she’d made.
“Of course I’ll help,” Samantha quickly fixed Olivia’s outfit, helping her put her clothes on the right way though quite surprised they matched. Brushing her hair and helping her brush her teeth, they finished up and headed to the office. “See, it was just a bad dream,” she offered as they headed to the bullpen.
Samantha frowned, noticing Martin’s desk was cleared. Looking around, she suddenly felt pale and wondered what was going on. Hopefully it was nothing.
“Marty!” Olivia exclaimed seeing him coming out from an office.
“Hey there,” he put on a smile, bending down giving her a hug. “I’ve missed you, even since yesterday.”
“Bad dream.” Olivia explained, hugging tight to Martin.
Martin glanced up watching as Samantha walked over eyeing his desk and then Olivia’s tight hold onto him. “Everything okay?” Martin asked glancing up at Samantha. It wasn’t like her to bring Olivia onto the floor that often.
“Yeah. Someone just had a nightmare last night, that something awful happened to you and I wanted to reassure her that you were fine.”
“I’m here, good as new,” Martin smiled feeling Olivia’s hold loosen. “No more bad dreams, okay?”
Olivia nodded, as if hearing that would magically make them disappear. “Take care of your mom for me,” he whispered into her ear.
Olivia gave a strange look to Martin and then up at Samantha. “Sam?” Olivia asked, not understanding who he was referring to. Her mother was gone, forever.
“Yeah, Sam.” Martin smiled weakly realizing his slip-up. “Isn’t it time for you to go back downstairs, play with your friends?” Olivia nodded taking Martin’s hand. “Do you want me to take you downstairs?” Olivia nodded again.
“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Samantha was surprised by how close the two of them were. She wondered if she’d made a mistake last night.
“It’s fine. I’ll be right back,” Martin nodded taking Olivia down to the daycare center downstairs. Watching the elevator doors close with the two of them, Samantha sighed glancing at Danny.
“Where the hell did all of Martin’s things go?” She eyed Jack’s office, seeing someone sitting in there, she didn’t recognize the man but had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach.
“I shouldn’t be the one to drop the news,” Danny shook his head. “Martin will be back, he can explain it all to you.”
“Explain what? That he’s quitting? That’s he’s transferring?” She was getting angry. Was this about them and yesterday? She couldn’t believe he’d have pulled strings this fast to get away from her. It was unbelieveable!
“I’m not getting in the middle of his decisions,” Danny answered. “He owes you an explanation and I’m sure when he’s back up here he’ll say goodbye.”
Hearing that, it choked up Samantha. “Goodbye?” She repeated, hearing the ding of the elevator and immediately she felt as though she were suffocating.
“Yeah,” Martin breathed walking up behind her, “we should talk.”
“You’re quitting. Just like that.” She answered quite matter of fact. Her heart was pounding, she felt blind-sided. “Last night was what, a test?” She didn’t understand.
“No,” Martin shook his head, “I don’t want you seeing it like that.” Whether it was or not, he wasn’t going to confess. “I’ve been promoted Sam.”
“Somehow I feel like this isn’t good news.” She stared at him, her expression not changing in the slightest.
“I feel like it is, for me.” He breathed staring at her. “I’m going deep, undercover,” Martin explained. “I’m going to be gone for awhile, out of the country.”
“We’re federal Martin. What the hell are you doing out of the country,” she was slightly angry, she couldn’t help it!
“The offer was with the CIA,” he stared at her, letting out a breath. “I can’t explain where I’ll be or what I’ll be doing but I wanted to say goodbye.”
“So that’s it? Last night, what the hell was last night? You confessing your feelings and now I find out you’re not only getting what you want to call a promotion but lets face it, a completely different job.” She was more than slightly angry.
“Sam,” Martin breathed, “I knew you wouldn’t understand,” shaking his head he sighed. “I don’t want to fight, not as a goodbye, please.”
She was stunned to say the least. “You’re leaving, now? How long have you been planning on going?”
“It doesn’t matter, the offer came to me,” Martin explained. “It’s a good opportunity and right now, I’m not tied down. I should take it.”
“You already have,” she breathed staring back at him.
Martin nodded, “yes, I have.”
“So that’s it.” Samantha shrugged. “I know I can’t convince you to stay.”
“I’m sorry,” he breathed seeing the look of disappointment on her face. “I’ll only be gone a year, two max.”
“You won’t,” Samantha shook her head. “I mean one assignment follows another. If you’re with the CIA you won’t be in New York.”
“You don’t know that,” Martin stared at her.
“I know it doesn’t matter, you’ve made up your mind. You have a plane to catch.” She stared at him, hurt, anger, and confusion crossing her face. She knew Olivia would be disappointed but she could look after her own daughter, she’d take care of her, they’d take care of each other.
“I’m sorry, Sam.” His hand reached out, his fingers grazing her cheeks.
Her eyes closed and as much as she wanted to enjoy his touch, the last time it might ever be, she moved her head away. “Don’t tell me you’re sorry when I know you’re not. You should have told me last night. You should have been honest with me, Martin.”
“I didn’t know anything until this morning.”
“Right. So I come in the same time as you and already you’re desk is cleared out.”
“I got an email earlier, around four this morning.” Martin explained. “They asked if I was accepting the offer. I couldn’t turn it down.”
“Of course not,” Samantha sighed, shaking her head. “I don’t want to stay mad at you.” She had the distinct feeling seeing him again, it might never happen. “I’m just, I’m hurt.”
“I know and I am sorry. This isn’t how I meant for you to find out. I wasn’t even sure it’d happen.” Martin sighed. “Tell Olivia I’m sorry too.”
“Yeah,” Samantha rubbed the back of her neck. “Somehow I don’t think sorry will cut it.” Sighing she stared at him, chewing on her bottom lip. “Can I contact you at all?”
Martin shook his head no. “I’ll be deep, you know how it is. I promise though, my first trip back to the states, I’ll look you up, come and visit.”
“So a year? Two max?” She made a face, not liking the sound of waiting that long to see him. “How about you stay, please?”
“You said it yourself last night and you’re right. You need time to grow with Olivia. Honestly I need some space while you two have that time. I need to clear my head, figure my own stuff out and when the time’s right, we’ll figure it all out. As friends or whatever.” He left it open.
“Whatever,” she repeated nodding weakly, letting out another sigh. “Okay.” There wasn’t much else she could say to stop him. “So goodbye it is then,” she let out another breath.
Martin nodded, “I should head out, I have a plane to catch.” He eyed the door seeing his new supervisor coming out of the office with Jack.
“Take care, Martin.” It was hard to let him go, to say goodbye. What choice did she have though? He’d made up his mind, long before she had a say.
“You too, Sam.” He stood up watching Samantha and leaning down giving her a hug. “Take care of yourself.” With that, he headed for the elevator, Samantha’s back to the doors, hearing the ding and closing her eyes. Her heart broke with the sound, feeling a part of her leaving, breaking even as he left. She thought she’d finally found what had been missing. She thought Olivia was enough and though she loved her daughter beyond anyone and anything, she realized now she loved Martin almost as much.
The End.
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Post by Rat on Nov 2, 2008 22:21:50 GMT -5
great ending. what a shock. martins leaving for a while. olivia is going to be so sad. so sam must be kicking herself, he's leaving and she couldn't do anything about it
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niping
Undercover Agent
Posts: 281
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Post by niping on Nov 3, 2008 8:03:20 GMT -5
Nooo! How could you do that?! I'm in shock, I was expecting a happy ending. I hope you're planning to do a sequel missy
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Post by cludwig on Nov 3, 2008 11:09:13 GMT -5
OMG, I 100% agree with niping. I did expect a happy ending as well. - And now I am just so completely floored. But I don't think that comes close to how Olivia is gonna feel. She really adores Martin.
Please do a sequel or an epilogue... Pretty please?
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Post by freitazal on Nov 3, 2008 11:37:52 GMT -5
OMG, I 100% agree with niping. I did expect a happy ending as well. - And now I am just so completely floored. But I don't think that comes close to how Olivia is gonna feel. She really adores Martin. Please do a sequel or an epilogue... Pretty please? yes , please do one of them , Nanda
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